I’m at altitude, cruising along. It was a rough one today, don’t get me wrong, but I got my shit done. I was tiiiirrrrreeedddd. Didn’t get enough sleep because we had a worker come by at 7:30 in the AM to get into a unit for some work. Early mornings and me, we don’t see eye to eye, really. More like at each other’s throats.
It wasn’t an impromptu visit, though. I knew the guy was coming. So, you deal. Do what you gotta do.
Then, it was work all day. Started a wee bit late and kinda got behind, but nothing too crazy. I finished a couple minutes shy of my goal, but nothing that I can’t make up tomorrow with some well-chosen lessons. The last one I chose to finish the day out today was a doozy…not the best choice. Should have tackled that one first. But, you live and then you learn. Can’t do it the other way around. It can be hard to tell sometimes what lessons are going to be challenging and which ones will be a breeze.
The writing was a failure today. I did sit down to do it, but even then it was later than I’d hoped to be doing it. I only got a page written. But, no matter. I’ll just make it up over the next few days. Easy enough to get back on track when your goal is only 3 pages a day.
I decided to let my manager read my stuff. She texted me today asking about it, and that she’ll be on a flight and looking for stuff to read. I told her it’s not ready, which it honestly isn’t, but at the very least, she can see what I’ve been up to. That I actually *have* been working.
The pilot script I think actually needs the most work still. It’s all happening too fast in that script. It’s hard to get your bearings on such a completely new world, and I need to scale the plot elements back some. Put in some scenes I’d taken out for page-count and move the end of the episode back a bit in the timeline.
That’s a personal pet peeve of mine, actually…when pilots move too fast. Try to cram too much stuff into that first crucial episode. The most important thing is to establish relationships. Meet our characters. The actual plot doesn’t matter as much, at least in how much of it goes by. The Lost pilot actually comes to mind as one that did that pretty freaking well. The *plot* of that pilot is insanely simple. There was a plane crash, and now we’re on this island that has scary and weird things going on. What do we do now? It’s awesome.
Even the plot for the three-hour Battlestar Galactica “pilot” is really simple: the Cylons destroy the human colonies, and Galactica is left as the sole survivor to either fight in a blaze of glory death, or turn with the few remaining ships and run. Pretty simple. My pilot…is not that simple. It can be. It *will* be…but it’s not quite there yet.
The difference between a refined sense of criticism and a refined ability to create…it’s a chasm right now. One that hurts my heart. I *know* what good material is, and I therefore know that my own material isn’t…yet. Yet, guys! Because the only way I can get there is to create, and then send it out and listen. And even though it’s rough, having someone else read it and tell me the hate it or they love it or they don’t get it or they totally get it…that’s the first step toward refining it. And learning.
Ohhhhh…it’s going to be painful. I will make no bones about the fact that I want everything I write to be brilliant and finished every time I write it. I do. I really really do. Every time. I hate hearing that there’s a problem with something, and I tense up and I get defensive and fail to fight the urge to argue…until I check my ego and my fear, and I open my mind, and I learn what those other perspectives have to teach me. Hopefully, learn anyway. I’m not a saint in that department, either. But, when I *do*…that’s when I grow. And, that’s when my stuff gets better.
I wish I was better at that. For reals. It’s not something I like about myself. So…I will endeavor to improve.
That’s all I have for tonight you guys. I have a case of the sleeps. And, I still have to brush and floss my teeth…tomorrow! Writing will be done, and so will the editings. Khapl’a!