I had a good Sunday. How was yours?
Woke up a bit later than usual, but that was totally fine. I needed the extra sleep. Saturday was a pretty exhausting day. I took a nap today too and was out for like an hour.
BUT…I got the work done I wanted to, cleared out the narration queue. That’s the goal every Sunday…although I want it to happen every DAY if possible. Spread the work out a little better instead of these all-or-nothing days.
I watched a little baseball, spring training baseball…went on a walk with the bear, which was SO nice. It’s a good thing, guys, when you truly enjoy the company of your spouse. I am continually reminded of that fact when we do have time to spend together. The pups were great on the walk, we met a dad and his daughter on the top of the loop with their retriever of some kind. Coops was stressed out at first, but I got him to calm down, and the daughter sat down to pet him. I then went grocery shopping and made myself some dinner, and then sat down for a sesh with Bioshock. What a fun game! Holy crap. So fun. Scary as fuck. Totally immersive world. I’m not very good at it yet.
Tomorrow, it’s a solid work day. I have high hopes about how much work I can get done…and then it’s two solid days of just reading Starstuff. The real work continues…I get to dive back into that world *I* created.
I was talking with the Ho today about yesterday; she’d read my blog last night about how these WGA events worked like a double-edged sword for me – on the one hand inspirational and on the other hand they stress me out about Hollywood in general. Well, I pegged it down to two main thoughts:
The first is that the more I learn about this industry, the more it makes me as a person feel powerless. I feel powerless because I have no clout, I have no resume, and I’m choosing a particular creative path that will never allow me to be my own boss in this town. The bigger feeling of powerlessness is certainly that I’ve had no success getting “inside,” but the other half of the writer having no real power is scary too.
The second came from one of the panelists yesterday, where someone told a story about their grandmother taking them aside one day after them saying they wished they could be one of the popular kids. She said, “my dear, you go where you are wanted. Those are your people, and that’s who you are.” Well…that really stuck with me. Hollywood hasn’t wanted me so far. I haven’t offered them something worth taking…yet…and so maybe that’s not where I should be going. At least for now.
I told Liz that I remember her coming to me after reading Starstuff and telling me that all my other work beforehand had been really cool, for sure, she hadn’t been humoring me…but that THIS is what I should be doing. That really stuck with me because I’d felt the same thing. Writing Starstuff had been fun, but even more than that, it had felt natural. So maybe that’s where I’m wanted, you know? Maybe.
It was an odd time, too, to go to this WGA event given that I was already feeling the post-finishing-a-project Blues.
Anyway…the work continues. We shall see what tomorrow brings.