So, the Ho and I just got back from seeing Suicide Squad and man…it’s been a while (even in this summer’s season of blockbusters) since I’ve watched a movie that was quite as terrible as that one.
It. Was. A. Shit. Show.
I was just talking it over with Liz and put a finger on why, precisely, I disliked the movie so much…and it wasn’t because of some artistic choice or some aesthetic that just isn’t me…it was that this movie felt like a student film, or a bad indie. An “indie” with a freaking $150 million budget, for sure…but the ineptitude with which the movie was executed legitimately felt like an amateur made it. Like they were so far over their heads with their script and their shooting schedule that they had to slash the movie down as they went along, and then when they were editing it together they realized nothing fucking made sense and they had no story or characters, and so they needed to use every line of dialogue they could just to explain what in the fuck was going on. Just so an audience could keep up…and even that didn’t work, guys.
Execution was so poor for this movie, I don’t even know where to start. If someone were bringing this to me for notes, I’d have to bite my tongue from telling them they were fucked and they needed to burn the whole thing down and start over. Re-shoot with a new script and a new budget, OR better yet, invent a time machine so they could go back and stop whatever shit-dominoes that had started to fall. I don’t know where to start. Nothing made sense. Nothing landed. Nothing was even exciting. We didn’t have THAT. I mean, at least in Jason Bourne which also made no goddamned sense…at least in that movie, the action sequences were exciting. Man…
…let’s just suffice it to say that I was disappointed, and a bit stunned in disbelief.
DC: you should fire everyone, starting with Zack Snyder. Get rid of them all. Start over. It’s not working.
But they won’t. This movie will make a fuck-ton of money. It already has. And maybe, MAYBE in spite of themselves we’ll get one half-decent Wonder Woman movie…but they are absolutely squandering the golden age of comic book blockbuster movies. Just because people are going to SEE your movie, doesn’t mean that they LIKE it coming out. It’s so clear to me that DC has people in charge who don’t understand movies, and don’t understand story-telling. They were completely unprepared for Marvel’s brain-trust, and they’re being completely out-classed. This movie was an embarrassment.
Anywho…today was a really, really good day…and despite all that fire spitting up there, I actually had fun going to see the movie with the Ho. Sure, it was shaking our heads in disbelief at what was happening on screen and making fun of it the whole time…but I have so much fun watching movies of ANY kind with her. I also had a great writing sesh, and got all my narrating and Netflix work done.
It was a good day. And now it’s time for bed.
Night!