Today was my brother Russell’s birthday. He would have been 28 today, two years away from a dirty thirty. I wonder what he would have been doing? Where would he be working? Who would he be with? What would be his favorite band right now?

I worked all day on my Starstuff manuscript, going through all my copy editors notes. I finished. It was rather draining, to be honest, and I’m thinking about taking a day off tomorrow to give the brain a break to not think about writing…but we’ll see. I’m already feeling better after having just taken a nap, eaten some food, showered, and gone outside on a walk with the pups.

There’s a character in my book, Barry, who was inspired by my brother Russell. Russell had all of Barry’s good traits, and none of his bad ones. Sweet, generous, friendly, curious, loved his backpack when he was younger, wore his emotions on his sleeve, someone you could count on…that was my brother. I did a lot of editing today around Barry, and I couldn’t help but think about Russell.

One of my most distinct memories of my brother was right after I’d moved into my apartment on the HSU campus – he must have been 10 or 11 – and he came to visit me for a sleepover. I cooked him food, we went and saw the Disney movie Atlantis together at the discount movie theatre in Arcata…I think it was $1.00…and we had such a good time. We both liked the movie. He thought my apartment and my macaroni and cheese was really cool.

I’d have loved to have spent Russell’s 28th birthday with him. I spent it instead with Barry and my own family: Liz, Coops, and Coco. I spoke with my parents and my brothers, too. This day is always a hard day, but my family was in good spirits. Life is good right now. One thing, unquestionably, that my brother’s death taught me was to savor these times when life is good. They’re the most important thing to remember.

Time now for sleep.

Happy Birthday, Russell. I love you, I miss you, and I’ll never forget you.