I’m listening to music tonight that I put into a playlist at the beginning of the year, a really rough part of the year for me. I had failed. I’d set many goals, many deadlines for my writing, and I was missing them all. It was a horrible, vicious cycle of failure and it was crushing my spirit. I wouldn’t quite say that I was losing hope, but I was definitely feeling like I wasn’t equipped with the tools to figure out a solution.
I remember feeling so frustrated. It wasn’t that long ago, just a few months, and this music takes me right back there.
How much has changed.
I just wrote the last words to the most troublesome storyline in my new book. It’s almost 110,000 words now. Back at that time, I really had zero words. Maybe 20,000. Barely the start of a workable novel. Now, I have more than enough…which is a problem in and of itself, but a problem of a COMPLETELY different nature. Now, it’s a problem I know how to fix.
This book is finally, finally, finally getting close to being finished. I have probably another 40,000 words to get there, to be honest, but it’s way fucking closer than where I was back at the beginning of the year. Right now, at my current level of daily output, I can crank that out in two weeks.
So, don’t give up. Ever. Keep going. IT. WILL. GET. BETTER. If you keep working.
For me, it was addressing the deadline first. I wasn’t ready for that deadline. I didn’t have the tools to handle that deadline.
Then, it was taking that reprieve from the anxiety it produced, and figuring out how to get rid of the anxiety that writing produced.
Today, if I’m feeling spun up, I slip in my headphones and do a 15- or 20-minute session of meditation. No joke. Sometimes it’s guided, sometimes it’s in-guided, but I meditate, relax, and let all the bullshit swirling in my brain just float away. Then, I go straight into writing for a timed session. 30 minutes, usually.
After that, I’m back “in” my writing. Taking breaks from that point forward are just to recharge, let the brain rest, or focus on something else for a bit, and then it’s back in.
The game has been changed. Finally.
FINALLY.
Don’t give up.
Ever.
This goes for you, dear reader, including you future-Ira. Remember: it does get better.
It’s John Berkey tonight for the win on artwork.