Feeling better tonight. Didn’t feel better waking up…but I went into work anyway because I had to 😛
I feel very out of my routine, so kind of disconnected and anxious. BUT, I know exactly why. Being sick really kind of threw me.
It’s also an opportunity out there in the writing world that I look at and think, “damnit…I could do that.” If I just sat down and wrote, I could say yes to this opportunity. And it really is that simple. If I could just write the words, I could make the money, I could work with this person.
And then that kind of stresses me out, because the fear sets in; if I were to say yes to something like that, what’s to say I would be able to do it this time? What’s to say I’d write those words. I’m not writing them even right now…and then I get down on myself.
So, that’s also making me feel out of sorts. Anxious. Disconnected.
And what I’m thinking about right now is: breathe. Focus on writing the words. Do that first. THEN think about those other opportunities. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Take it one step at a time.
And that makes me feel better. Because that’s the heart of it: get in a good, solid, consistent space with the writing first. And then everything will come.
I think.
So, tomorrow, back to the routine. Which means it’s time for bed so I can get to work early enough to write. Provided, of course, I’m not feeling sick still.
Blech.
Wish me luck.