Definitely struggling with the resistance at the moment, but what’s crazy is that I’m used to ten pages a day enough now that…I just do it. Even though the resistance part of me is freaking out and trying to put a halt on everything—for no other reason than just, I’m actually getting this novel done; which is to say, no sane reason—I sit down in my chair and crank out the requisite pages day in and day out. That basically a miracle. Really it’s not, nor is it a mystery: it’s hard work. Work I’ve been doing for several years, now.
So, yeah. The novel moves a long apace.
I was reading Dan Simmons on writing well today, and he was talking about the Spartans, and how they very closely trained and monitored their fears; one thing they very much wanted to avoid was the berserker, the soldier who would become completely possessed by the fighting spirit and thus lose all rationality, just flailing, uncoordinated, and actually harmful to his fellow Spartans. Dan equated pouring out voluminous prose to being a berserker. Literature, like the Spartans, is very precise, very controlled, and very deliberate with its words.
I’m learning to be a berserker right now. That’s where I’m at. I’m under no illusion that I’m a Spartan. I have been before, actually. Certainly not to the level that Simmons is equating to those ancient Greeks…but I have been much more careful with my words in the past. And I’ll do that again. Soon, I think. But right now, I am learning about how to write FASTER. And despite my fellow indie authors’ claims to the contrary, I do not think faster is actually better. Being in the “flow” is exhilarating, without question, and its an incredibly important part of the writing process. Insanely good stuff comes out of the flow, stuff you didn’t even realize you had in you…BUT…raw flow is not enough. It’s not the end point. It’s the beginning, and in that way I think Dan and I might be of the same mind. To truly reach the highest heights—or really even just be worthy of being “published” and I do mean that in the traditional sense—one MUST refine their prose. Flow is far too sloppy. We move too fast in the flow to experience the words as the reader does. That takes editing. Rewrites. Polish.
I think that cognitive dissonance has hurt the psyche a bit this week, given voice to the resistance that doesn’t want me finished this book. But here’s the thing: being able to write when I want to is a muscle. It’s a skill. A skill I want, very very much. And that’s what I’m doing right now. I practicing writing words, putting pen to paper, fingers on keyboard, and seeing how fast I can actually go. Is my prose as polished as I want it to be? Nope. Definitely not. I can do better. I will do better. But I will also be able to do better faster because of this practice. So, I think it’s worthwhile. I’m sure it is, even.
Night night.