I’d say that writing this book has been more fraught of a process than the last, and it’s not because of the story…it’s a few other things, actually.
First, I’d wanted to write this one slightly differently. Slower. Less pages per day spread out over a longer period of time. But resistance got the better of me, and I squandered my early days, not writing hardly at all, and now here I am, back to my old patterns, cranking it out pretty much as fast as I can. Sigh. So, that’s frustrating.
Second, and this is harder to define…I’m growing as a writer. Not necessarily skill-wise, but certainly ambition, certainly in desire to grow my skills…and that’s just a fraught place to be, you know? I’m very aware of what I’ve done before and not wanting to repeat myself, which sounds like a comment on this book and its story, but it isn’t. Not really. It’s far more granular than that, far more in the details, the relationships, the dialogue, you know? And being on edge in terms of trying to make all that stuff as good as it needs to be. Of nailing my ambitions for the story rather than just making it work. It’s exhausting to be in that place. It’s very fraught. I can’t just phone it in.
But I am getting the work done. I am getting this series done. And none of it will be phoned in, I can tell you that, lol. Workin my ass off over here.
In bed on time again, which feels good. I like getting that little tap-tap in the morning from my Apple Watch congratulating me on hitting my sleep goal of eight full hours. It really helps the fatigue for that second writing session, for sure.
Anyway. Looking forward to reading tonight. Haven’t done that the past few nights. It helps, I think, that Liz is here. I missed her.
Night night.