One of the boys is dreaming of Bill Shatner on the regular, and Bill likes Two Guys One Trek. Meanwhile on the Enterprise, we travel to the the chinese planet, and apparently it’s the 4th of July.

According to McCoy we’re 96% water, Kirk can’t figure out how to play freeze tag, and Scotty drinks an alien under the table like a BOSS.

It’s Nazis! Kirk and Spock dodge the gestapo, pretend to be a film crew, practice their salutes, and Josh decides that Netflix is heaven.

Hey! We meet an actress whose a big character in a later show, we have some shenanigans with some weird glowy orbs and a dude named Sargon, and Ira sells Josh on reading the book “Old Man’s War."

Ira and Josh realize they’ve made friends with the crew of the Enterprise, Kirk beams down some muskets to a bunch of locals, and we learn that you shouldn’t wear Mugatu in the summer.

Josh imagines a Star Trek greeting card with a dangerous Vulcan bear on the bridge of the Enterprise, Ira likes when Spock goes into the “Dark Zone,” and we wonder when Bones and Spock are finally going to throw down.

Happy Birthday to Bill Shatner; this is definitely his favorite episode. Don your pinstripe suit, grab your tommy gun, and get used to our Captain calling himself “Koik.” Another highlight in this season’s “themed” episodes, particularly Kirk’s driving...

In the wise words of Herman the Gladiator: the providers provide, but you know, sometimes you have to provide for yourself. Kirk fights colored brains, Spock and Bones go at it with each other, and we make some dubious choices with some slave girls.

We ask the big questions on TG1T, y’all: is this on the record? Kirk really shines in this one, yes this is definitely ON the record, and we see Trek turn the mundane into the captivating. One of the best!

Scotty is a murderer!!! Come on down to the Kasbah, take a load off, listen to some groovy music, and don’t mind JACK THE RIPPER OVER THERE IN THE CORNER.