Man, I have no idea what I’m going to write about tonight. Usually when that happens, it’s because my mind is empty from a long day, and today was certainly a long day…but my mind is teeming right now. It’s running, I think, three or four separate tracks simultaneously. They’re weaving in and out of my conscious and subconscious thoughts.
Track one, we’ll call it one, is about how I am my own problem, and I am my own solution – this relates to my recent revelation about my pattern of behavior when it comes to starting projects, and how overwhelmed I can get, which leads to depression.
Two would be about this election, and how fundamentally opposed I am to Donald Trump’s candidacy for the president of my country. I could write for an hour on this subject and still not feel like I’ve fully expressed myself…so I won’t. tonight. Instead, I’ll focus on voting in a few weeks.
Three is my novel, where I’m at and where I want to go with it – jointly tied with that thought is a thread about how to get better at writing, and what steps I should take to get there.
Four is how nice it feels to have knocked out two days in a row of excellent work days. I’m tired…was tired…today. Tonight, I feel fine. This new schedule really is working already. I know I create schedules for myself constantly…but the nature of my work demands it. My work is always changing now. But now, maybe finally…my work schedule doesn’t need to.
Just a week ago I was writing my entries full of despair and frustration. That’s the reality of depression. Even minor depression, which is what I have from time-to-time. Sometimes, it just hits and I have to deal with it. Take action where things need to change, and just ride out the rest. This time, it was a mixture of both. Maybe it’s always like that. I should keep track of it. But, at the very least, I’m documenting here and now that it was a mixture of both just starting to “feel” better AND deciding to address some issues in my behavior that were causing me anxiety. With both of those taken care of, for now, I feel a world of difference.
I wrote for two hours today. Like it was nothing. I got all my Flix work done. I wasn’t able to do any narrations because the Flix work demanded a full 8 hours of attention, but…I still will have time either through extra hours or my off days to make up the narration ground that I’ve lost. Starting tomorrow, it’s do or die on that front.
Coco is pressed up against me, and Coops is currently passed out on Liz’s side of the bed. They’re such little nuggets. I love them. Nom nom nom.
Good night, folks. Gonna read and let this ol’ mind wind on down to sleepy town.
Ps- can’t remember if I mentioned it last night…but the site transfer is complete. Huzzah! And everything is still here! 😛
Artwork tonight is from Richard Bizley. SO 70s RIGHT? Love it.