Today, I fell flat on my face.
I’m having a hard time prioritizing, and it really came crashing down on me today. It really comes down to a breakdown in routine. I’m trying new routines, and that process has its downside, I’ve learned. But, really, it’s less the routine that’s failing me, and more the lack of clear goals for each day. I’m really struggling with that right now because I feel overwhelmed.
It’s not just work stuff that’s overwhelming, it’s what’s happening around me. Liz is working full time, and I can’t check my phone any more without reading about politics, which are very distressing to read about. And then I engage with the politics talk and all the sudden, an hour and a half has disappeared. Couple that with, genuinely, too much on my plate when it comes to work, and that’s a recipe for disaster.
I have to set boundaries, and I have to prioritize. I really think that’s my way out of this funk. It’s actually a week-long funk, isn’t it? With one kickass day stuck towards the beginning of it.
I’ve been thinking too much about the future, I’m afraid, and not enough on my present. I have things to get done that I’m not getting done. I need to focus on that. I need to focus on making my present pleasureable and engaging as opposed to strategizing about my future being pleasureable and engaging. As I sit here writing this blog tonight, I’m realizing that. How can I set up my days for the next couple months to make them as productive and un-exhausting as possible? That’s my key.
I’m going to go do that right now, and keep this entry short.
Wish me luck.
Artwork tonight is by Robert McCall.