Goodbye to a couple things tonight.
First: goodbye to Andre Iguodala.
The Warriors began their dynasty by trading for him in 2013. He was a key piece…perhaps THE key piece…in catapulting them from an intriguing young playoff team to becoming champions.
We traded him today.
It truly is the end of an era. Oh, and by KD, too…you’re an incredible player who helped us win back to back championships, and what should have been a third. I’ll miss you too and your amazing shooting. But, honestly, we won’t miss the drama.
I’ll have major respect for you if you manage to bring the Nets a championship. You’ve never done that without help from the Dubs. We’ll see if you have what it takes on your own.
The other goodbye tonight is to June, and the first half of 2019.
I had a meltdown in the first half of this year with my writing. I’d written my second book twice, from the ground up, and still had nothing in my hands I wanted to work with. It was still broken. I felt broken.
Well, it seems fitting then that I’m ending the first half of this year by diving back in, this time with help, and this time with counseling behind me…and I have some optimism this time. It feels different this time, and that’s not faking. That’s not just me with rose tinted glasses on this time. Sure…I haven’t figured it all out yet…but it just feels different.
This has been a good month. Busy. I’m working three jobs right now (plus podcasting)…but I can honestly say this: I have the most healthy relationship with those jobs that I think I’ve ever had. Ever. Each of them has their place in my life, and they stay there.
I’m also focusing less on control…and more, I guess, just getting my shit done in the moment and then moving on. Not letting that bleed elsewhere.
Today is a perfect example. I was thinking about this earlier…today we went and were out of the house basically all day on a Sunday. We went to a dog meetup for Odie, who has terminal lymphoma, poor pup. And then we went and hung out with Nikolai. He made a (truly, no bullshit) amazing lunch for us, and then we went together and got some ice cream down the street along with K-Bear and Arg, too. And it took all day, which usually would have stressed me the fuck out. I’d be thinking I needed to come home and do something, or watch the baseball game, or…I don’t know. Just stress.
But, that didn’t happen today. I’d already done all the shit I wanted to do, and anything that wasn’t done yet would have to wait.
It felt healthy. I felt present.
So…that’s my focus for the second half of the year, to be honest. Not page counts or books finished. My focus is on me. My mental health. My own happiness, and not so much the happiness I get from what I do.
That’s hard for me
Really, really hard.